According to the Google Webmaster tools, I have 285 Google subscribers to my feed.

Wait, huh? 285?? That can’t be right….

For one, the number just seems high to me. For two, I’d say that other than HNT posts the most number of commenters I’ve had on one post is less than 20. Which says to me that either I have a lot of lazy/lurker readers, or the 285 is just nonsense.

Because it was pointed out to me (most recently) by my friend Sarah, I do realize that there are folks who read my blog in the feed (Hi, Rob)  and can’t ever really visit my decidedly NSFW/Not-Family-Friendly blog. So I’ve been trying to do more with the feed. It’s being met with equal parts “whahoo I did it” and “goddammitwtfpieceofshit”.

First I started out seeing if I could find a WordPress plugin that would not only show comment count, but allowe the reader to submit a comment right from the feed. But I don’t think that exists.

Next I added in the “share” icons to the posts and to the feed, so that’s somethin I guess.

Then I was at somebody else’s blog and saw their Feedburner icon showing the number of subscribers. Their number was considerably lower than mine; the reason that struck me as odd is because they have been around as a blogger for a lot longer than me and I was under the impression that they and their blog were a lot more popular an well-known than mine.  So I figured Feedburner was more accurate. I signed up for Feedburner.

And here’s where my eyes go wide and I realize I’m in over my head.

Feedburner (which is friggin -owned- by Google now, yes?) says I have 27 subscribers to my feed. Now I don’t think that number is accurate either…why isn’t it picking up on the Google subscribers that Google Webmaster Tools reports I have?  EDIT: After having Feedburner manage things for a full day rather than partial day, it’s now reporting 455 subscribers. And you think I was gobsmacked about 285.

So then I started poking around in the features with Feedburner. Changing how my feed looks, etc.  In a section called “FeedFlare” there’s a couple options I thought I’d put in, like the comment count, the ability to email the post, and the ability to email me without having to go to the website for my address.  But the comment count isn’t showing, nor is my “Email the author” link.

“Allow subscribers to email you directly using a web-based form FeedBurner provides. (If there is no author email address encoded in your feed, this Flare does not display.)”

Encoded in my feed?? How and where??

*sigh

OH! I forgot this! I did away with the comments feed when I switched to Feedburner…..I never use it on other blogs, but if you did subscribe to that, please let me know, I’ll put it back.

Ok I put the comments feed over to Feedburner too.

And I still can’t fucking figure out this shit, the FeedFlares. I selected both the WordPress and the Blogger comment count, knowing full well I’m WordPress…..and the fucking Blogger one works, but not the WordPress! However clicking on the comments count doesn’t take you to the comments point of the post. And I can’t edit it. Can’t make the “Email the Author” work. Can’t figure out ANY of it. Grrrrrr.